One day in our past, in the stone age of rock
After learning to walk, humans started to talk
So, it didn’t take long for bad words to corrupt
The kind that we mutter once we are grown up!
But –
It’s when we are young that the cussing can start
The habit of swearing soon makes us feel smart
Vocabulary grows. Kids slowly get older
They start to say phrases more brazen and bolder
You have to be careful when children are near
Whatever you say, all the young ones will hear
If you drop the F-bomb, there’s shame and dismay
But then it’s too late. There’s no way to UNSAY!
Kids will REPEAT IT in a voice strong and loud
They’ve learned a new word, and it makes them so proud
They’ll say it again until they’re told to HUSH!
Mothers are mortified. Marine sergeants will blush!
Practice makes perfect, on that, we agree
When you learn how to swear, you will do it with glee!
Well-chosen expletives can shock and can stun
That makes them a joy and tremendous great fun!
All the do-gooders begin to start fussing
Whenever somebody cuts loose and starts cussing
They’re grossly offended. They want to pro-test
But they’ve said the same words –
They just haven’t confessed!
Using less than five letters makes you feel sublime
It comes in so handy at just the right time
A blizzard of badness pouring out in a stream
Will make the church ladies cover their ears and scream!
The lunacy of driving can make you start swearing
You’re ranting and raving. The car horn is blaring
Throw in some wild gestures considered taboo
With giddy excitement, you turn the air BLUE!
Miss a nail with the hammer – the world will explode
A flat, purple thumb. The cussing mother-lode!
And you’ll shout EVERY swear word you possibly know
When you fire a new nail gun into your big toe!
Catch APPENDAGE in zipper – you could be CASTRATED!
The howling unleashed will be more than X-RATED!
Because –
In-tense discomfort makes someone pro-fane
Those LOUD dirty words ease the pain in your brain
KIDNEY STONE!!! Oh, no! You grunt, groan, and moan
No doubt the worst misery that you’ve ever known
You hop up and down, and you push and you strain
It feels like a beach ball! Your bladder won’t drain!
Pass stone in a hospital. Agony unreal
Unleash the obscenities along with a squeal!
They escape from your lips without any forethought
So loud that they’re heard in the car parking lot!
* PROFANITY PREFERENCE *
Swear under your breath – or the top of your lungs
Invent a new language. You’re speaking in tongues!
Let out the frustration, the rage, and the pain
If cussing while bleeding, it will leave a STAIN!
You’ve now read a poem about cursing and more
And all the foul language that many abhor
But a four-letter word was NOT used in this rhyme
Your morality is safe!
THERE WAS NO VERBAL CRIME!
POETRY AT PLAY 